Sunday, February 22, 2009

The "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum) Think They Drove A Hole In One! LOL!

We will henceforth be regularly posting the latest Langley politics game in town. It's the hottest and newest political mind game in Looney Langley and is very loosely based on a political version of golf. The star players of the group we will be highlighting regularly henceforth are the "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum). They are none other than Councillors Grant Ward, Steve Ferguson, Charlie Fox and their political wannabee Foursome's strategic team captain, mentor and scorecard keeper, Councilor Jordan Bateman.

The games duration is a tournament of 36 holes and since November, we are still not yet even on the 4th hole so far a little over 3 months after this term's Tournament began! But that has not stopped the games being played by the "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum) . No Sirree! In fact Clr. Ward was first off the tee essentially throwing the rule book out just days after the game started in November crying foul and jumping up and down on the fairway because he could never fathom how his favorite previous golfing buddy, his former golf slate team captain and the previous 36 hole Tournament Chairman was ever booted from the tournament by the onlooking gallery of voting spectators last November! On November 15th, 2008, all the Langley Township Tournament gallery taxpaying spectators elected their club's newest roster of players including the tournament's new chairman and independent player, Mayor Rick Green.

Clr. Bateman though was not far behind Clr. Ward's Golf Game Chairman rules protest when he boldly called the newest player and Tournament Chair, Mayor Green, for so called illegal public airing of the contract details of their newest ~$50 million sports club building! After Mayor Green corrected and chided him, Bateman promptly made sure to correct that statement by telling everyone he did not say that at all. Rather rookie political sports commentator, Langley Advance reporter Claxton, misunderstood what he had really said. Wow.... glad Bateman cleared that up so that we will always now have to question any other written word by the political Golf game commentator in question. I guess because it was never refuted to the best of my knowledge. But then again Claxton and the Langley Advance never officially renounced their statement either to the best of my knowledge!

Last week while still on the 3rd fairway two more 4-Sum team/slate players revealed themselves when they spent well over an hour going over whether a report from a competing player would be submitted on the 2nd or 3rd of March. Yes folks, Clr. Charlie Fox and Clr. Steve Ferguson (student of Political Golf I guess?) essentially officially added their names on the same 4-Sum scorecard as their teammates, Clrs. Ward and scorecard keeper and team leader, Clr. Bateman! Believe it or not they then argued for over an HOUR about this ONE day's difference in providing a report on the Langley Club's finance's and budget committee . At the same time 4-Sum team member Clr. Ferguson argued with player Green about being left out of supposed private clubhouse get togethers. This of course was argued over by the two players for what again seemed an eternity.

Meanwhile, Clr. Fox at this very same meeting seemed to be angry because of 24 inches of information!??? Many said this was just another challenge to gauge the strength of the golf game's Tournament Chair and his rules, but Fox even insisted on distributing the picture of the 24 inches of documents that hearkened this commentator back to the famous photos that George W. Bush publicly as well pointed to as proof positive by illustrating pictures of Weapons of mass destruction in his ill fated attempt to sell his story with his CIA satellite photos. Good one Charlie I can now absolutely relate to the message you were trying to get across!!!

Suddenly yesterday another fracas over the political golf game rules exploded once again. You guessed it, Clrs. Ferguson & Ward again challenging the tournament chair,Mayor Green, with a tag team approach so aggressive indeed, that many thought that perhaps these two forgot that this was political golf, not political tag team wrestling! Even their scorekeeper made sure to distance himself when his blog sit in said he was far away and essentially not involved in this game diversion! Yeah right! This time they again argued loudly over their attempt to say the rules are not being followed by Tournament Chair and Player Mayor Rick Green. Clr. Ferguson again says he is being left in the dark which makes this writer wonder out loud how long it would take him indeed to find the light switch in any dark room? Heck even Clr. Ward is heard to be so inconsolable that he even insists that Mayor Green not use his first name at all but address him as "Councillor"! Remember he is still probably not at all over the fact that his previous team captain and tournament chair is no longer there! Probably never will be either!

The "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum) are also always accompanied by at latest count 3 caddies who are very reticent to be identified and prefer to avoid the limelight for obvious legal & political reasons. One, a failed wannabee politico is working the Langley Politics Golf Course Fire & Sports lobby control angle, the second is their recorder and documenter, and the third is their technical guru in charge of internet technology and video audio conversions. So successful in fact that he seems to be beaming with pride over his recent technical conversion success vociferously promoting his accomplishments!

The 4-Sum so far have focused their gaming skills against only two other competing players who are, to the 4-Sum's chagrin, constantly at par, often have successful birdies and definitely more than one hole in one in the early part of this game so far. It's only three holes after all into this term's game after all. With 33 holes remaining to be played in this unique Langley Politics game before the viewing gallery public audience votes in and out a new roster of players, we look forward to providing our continuing tournament coverage and will specifically continue highlighting the "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum) because frankly they need the EXPOSURE along with their trusted caddies. It's clear that the hidden and secretive back room caddies combined with their obvious lack of political gaming talent remains their handicap. Stay tuned for the continuing 'as your stomach turns' saga of the infamous "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum)! Only available here on Langley Free Press - your only reliable source of "Langley Politics Foursome" (4-Sum) Gaming Center coverage!...

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